motherhood

When you’re sorta on vacation…and sorta not

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So, I’ve got a couple kids home with me this week, and two more will be home starting next week. I’ve been spending a lot of time with them doing all sorts of fun stuff — hiking, museum-hopping, long walks — and it’s nice to be doing things other than gazing into my computer screen.

Just when I’d cut back on my writing, the war in Israel started, and my brain’s been feeling a little overloaded by all the bad news. I kept feeling horrified by all the reports, and yet unable to pull myself away from a screen.

Everything in my head feels jumbled up at the moment. Writing has gotten hard for me lately in a way I’m not used to. I’m having problems getting the words to flow. It’s like my brain needs to detox.

This week, I’ve had to leave the computer behind for long stretches, and it will remain that way until September. The only work I will be doing is the most essential, mainly writing episodes of my serial and preparing rewrites requested by editors for already accepted pieces. I’m hoping the little break will help me snap back to normal.

When school resumes in the fall, I’m expecting to work almost full-time, writing. It will be the first time I work full-time at anything other than being a wife and mom since my first child was born. I feel like I need to rest in the coming weeks before this new phase of my life starts.

I’m hoping to spend a lot of time in the great outdoors, getting exercise, absorbing smells and scenery and sounds. I’m hoping to enjoy my family, just enjoy them, their company and special-ness. It’s like my creativity needs fuel, and the tank needs to be topped off.

I wish I could stop writing altogether for the rest of the summer, but with the serial looming over me, that’s going to be impossible. So, this vacation isn’t really a vacation. But at least it’s something.

 

School is on and I’m back to work!

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The kids are back in school, and I am back to work. For four days, at least.

school, classroom

When the kids go to school, Mommy gets to write!

Because of the unfortunate discrepancy between the Jewish calendar and that of the traditional American school, my children will not experience a full week of school this fall until October. That means that even though their summer vacation is over, my days of child-wrangling are not.

It’s really important to me to take advantage of time alone during the day. I cherish the time I get to spend with my kids over summers and holidays, but when they are home, I can only write at night. Unfortunately, I am decidedly a morning person. The quality and quantity of what I write is strongly affected by my kids’ days off.

So today I tried to be as productive as possible. I got to pray at length, spent a couple hours on a story, took care of some housework, and made sure to listen to some music.  As a treat, G-d sent a playdate for my preschooler to extend the quiet a little longer.

One of the areas I’ve decided to work on this new year is time-wasting, so I tried very hard not to lose too much time to unnecessary internet surfing or checking my email repeatedly. I fought off the time wasting habit better than I expected today.

Who knows what tomorrow will bring? And Friday, for sure, will be spent minding my kids and preparing for the Yom Kippur fast. Sukkot will start just a few days later. But at least this evening, I’m wrapping up a workday feeling I did my best, B”H.

Coming clean: sometimes you’re supposed to do housework instead of writing

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G-d wanted me to do the dishes this morning.

I finished a large-ish writing project yesterday, then pulled open another document to begin the next assignment. I got the first paragraph written, and then every ounce of creativity in my brain dried up. Okay, I had a couple ideas, but they weren’t RIPE. More like literary fetal tissue than the next baby ready to be birthed.

Those who know me or who regularly read my blog know that I rarely get writer’s block. I usually have more ideas in my mind than really is good for me. Sometimes I can’t sleep at night, because my mind is so busy that the ideas are dripping out my ears.

kitchen photo

See this immaculate kitchen? Clearly not mine.

I spent the rest of yesterday taking care of my kids, feeding them and hubby (not to mention myself), and finishing Bird by Bird. (More on that later this week.) Then I had a Tiferes meeting, but before I left, I checked my email. A girlfriend would be dropping by Tuesday morning.

Oh, no.

You see, my back had been out, and then there had been Shabbos, and then I was writing on a “finish ASAP–please!” type deadline. Result–my house was a wreck. Continue reading →

“How do you do it?” How to write while you’re a stay at home mother

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People often ask me this question: How do you find time to write? Other moms work outside the home, sometimes full-time, yet my extremely-part-time and mostly at home writing puzzles them. Life as a FT mom is so wild and wacky, my head buzzes with ideas that could make great kids’ books. Doesn’t yours? This is how to get the ideas out and coherently on paper:

First of all, I have a giant notebook. Inside, I write lots of lists. Some titles you’ll find in my notebook: funny things kids do; annoying things kids do; what kids fight about; excuses they give; sweet things kids do. Don’t just email your girlfriend or tell Mom or Hubby about the craziness you endured during the day–write it down, even just in shorthand.
Also, after a workshop by Sarah Shapiro, I’ve learned to listen and practice writing dialogue. She says to do it daily, but I’m not that good about it. Just copy down a short conversation every week or so, and you’ll get practice.
Read LOTS…then respond in a book club, blog, or by writing a review online. If the book gave you an idea, extend it as far as you can.
No T.V. means more time and more productive time is available in this house.
After you write, revise. Test out on friends by sending your story to them or by joining a writing group. Then revise more according to what they suggest, then re-read to them. Is it improved?
Figure out who publishes similar pieces to yours, get the submission guidelines, then send the manuscript in! You’ll never know if you might have succeeded if you never try.
And remember, rejection letters are good for your middos.