vacation

Glixman Sales, Writing While Parenting, and Other Summertime Thoughts

beccakinla parenting, Uncategorized, writer, writing Tags: , , , , , 6 Comments

I heard from the CEO of Menucha Publishers last week, and he says that while there are no official numbers yet, the sales of Glixman in a Fix are strong. I’m a bit frustrated because due to the timing (the U.S. release was just before Shavuos, and now my kids are all home from school), I can’t really spend the time and energy on promoting the book that I’d like.

Writing has been hard, too. I’ve tried to write in the early hours while my kids are still either asleep or curled up with a book, but everything is slow, slow, slow. Still, I managed to write a short essay last week, have added a bit to my novel-in-progress, and started a new short story yesterday.

I’m trying to remind myself that summertime brings all sorts of new and different experiences, especially with everyone home from school and no camp in sight. Hopefully, all those novelties will feed my writing once I have more time on my hands again. But I can’t help feeling frustrated.

I’m baaaaack…

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I’m still not entirely back into my writing schedule, but Passover is over, and the kids are back in school.

Returning to writing after a yom tov is always a bit sketchy, but Passover is the worst. The prolonged break — due to the need to clean for the holiday, shop, plan and cook the meals, and then celebrate the entire 8 days — somehow transforms my brain. It doesn’t act like a writer’s brain does anymore. I almost feel like I am not myself. Not in a sad way, in an “Invasion of the Body Snatchers” way. Like I’m a different person at this time of year.

Thank G-d, I’ve had a little editing work to get me at my desk, and that means I have been somewhat productive the last two days. And I know from the past that, eventually, the writing will come. It better: I’ve got a book review to write tonight or tomorrow, and then I would like to return to my latest project.

I keep thinking about my “not writing” brain, which appears sporadically throughout the year. Even on Shabbos, my brain doesn’t switch to this state, at least, not entirely. Vacations sometimes do it even when not accompanied by religious holidays. Prolonged contact with my kids, and the need to take care of them with few breaks, often flips the switch.

In my “not writing” phase, I don’t really get many writing ideas, and if an idea somehow confronts me, I don’t feel an immediate impulse to get it down, which is my usual reaction to a good idea. I often feel preoccupied by housework in this state, not just by necessity (a holiday looming just ahead or guests on the way) but because I actually crave it. In a down moment, I find myself repairing the torn knee of my 9 year-old’s pants, not scribbling a poem in my notebook.

It’s different than being “blocked.” If I’m blocked, it’s distressing. If I’m blocked, I WANT to write, or at least to be able to say I’ve written something at the end of the day, but the words aren’t coming. On the other hand, when I’m just “not writing,” I don’t care if I didn’t write. It’s like I’m not a writer any more.

Does anyone else ever get this way? Just temporarily?

When you’re sorta on vacation…and sorta not

beccakinla parenting, parents, vacations, writer, writing, writing process Tags: , , , , , , , , , , Leave a comment

So, I’ve got a couple kids home with me this week, and two more will be home starting next week. I’ve been spending a lot of time with them doing all sorts of fun stuff — hiking, museum-hopping, long walks — and it’s nice to be doing things other than gazing into my computer screen.

Just when I’d cut back on my writing, the war in Israel started, and my brain’s been feeling a little overloaded by all the bad news. I kept feeling horrified by all the reports, and yet unable to pull myself away from a screen.

Everything in my head feels jumbled up at the moment. Writing has gotten hard for me lately in a way I’m not used to. I’m having problems getting the words to flow. It’s like my brain needs to detox.

This week, I’ve had to leave the computer behind for long stretches, and it will remain that way until September. The only work I will be doing is the most essential, mainly writing episodes of my serial and preparing rewrites requested by editors for already accepted pieces. I’m hoping the little break will help me snap back to normal.

When school resumes in the fall, I’m expecting to work almost full-time, writing. It will be the first time I work full-time at anything other than being a wife and mom since my first child was born. I feel like I need to rest in the coming weeks before this new phase of my life starts.

I’m hoping to spend a lot of time in the great outdoors, getting exercise, absorbing smells and scenery and sounds. I’m hoping to enjoy my family, just enjoy them, their company and special-ness. It’s like my creativity needs fuel, and the tank needs to be topped off.

I wish I could stop writing altogether for the rest of the summer, but with the serial looming over me, that’s going to be impossible. So, this vacation isn’t really a vacation. But at least it’s something.

 

Passover is over. Time to jump back on the wagon!

beccakinla how to write, joy, Judaism, letting go, passover, peace, pesach, wasting time, writing process Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , 4 Comments

I’ve written zero, zippo, nada since my limericks on the day before Passover, and I now have three pieces outstanding to editors, the first of which is due on Friday. YOW!

As a religious Jew, I was unable to write for most of the Pesach holiday, and chose not to during the more lenient, intermediate days (chol hamoed), as well. Hence the pile up on my to-do list. This post will necessarily be brief. I’ve got to peruse the notes I scribbled two weeks ago, when I received the assignment that’s due first, and start writing.

I think the vacation from writing was good for me, though. I spent a lot of creative energy on cooking (including trying a couple new recipes, even inventing an awesome vegan chocolate chip cookie that is 1) totally kosher for Passover, 2) easy, and 3) scrumptious) and also just playing with and enjoying my husband and kids. We played hours and hours of Monopoly Deal & Old Maid, and visited fun places in L.A. like the zoo and a local U-Pick farm. I let my husband and eldest son pick most of our outings–the WWII Aviation Museum was an unexpected delight. Letting them be in charge allowed me to relax and let go.

Now it’s back to creative work, but it seems a little less like work after the vacation.